Adventures in Pennsyltucky

[My high school BFF Lauren during our adventure to the Poconos Snake & Animal Farm. She jumped on the curb that was painted like a snake and said, "Look, I'm the Virgin Mary!" This is Lauren's brain. This is Lauren's brain after 12 years of Catholic school. Any questions?]

"Home again, home again, jiggity jog..." My Mom used to always say that whenever we would get back from a trip. She probably still does. I have absolutely no idea where it came from or what it means. And I am not sure if it sprang to my mind now because I am back home in Baltimore, or because I just visited my Mom in the town I grew up in in PA. That's P-A. That's how people in Pennsylvania say "Pennsylvania". P.A. I have no idea how that came about either. I can't imagine telling anyone that I live in M-D!

"Pennsyltucky," as far as I know, used to refer to the semi-backwoods swath of land between the civilizations of Pittsburgh and Philadelphia. But now I think it pretty much refers to the whole state. I do love Pennsylvania, most of it is very beautiful, and in most areas the people are fairly friendly, non-pretentious, and family-oriented. There is always a cookie table at weddings there, and it is the only place I have ever seen pierogies on a Chinese Buffet. But it seems to have evolved - well, maybe, "morphed," is a better word - from a through and through Blue State (very liberal, very blue collar) to a Red State thinly veiled as a Blue State. God help us if coal mines and/or the Pittsburgh Steelers ever cease to exist. All hope will then be lost.

But, I hate talking politics, so that is all I will say on the matter. Just scares me a bit, that's all. A lot of times when people find out I am from the Pittsburgh area but currently live in Baltimore, they will say that Pittsburgh reminds them a lot of Baltimore. There are a lot of similarities, I concur. But Baltimore is much more progressive. I know people in Pennsylvania who honestly believe that they don't know any homosexuals. It would be sad if it weren't so funny, and vice-versa.

I drove over 1,000 miles between last Thursday and Sunday, and though I was hoping that time on the road would help me clarify a few things in my head, it only muddled them up a bit more. Particularly it made me question whether I really WANT to go on this road trip I have been talking about so incessantly. My drive home yesterday was lovely, but driving roundtrip from my Mom's to the Poconos in dreary, overcast conditions just made me bored and sleepy.

I did have a great time with Lauren, my BFF from high school who still lives in the area. I stole her away from her husband and kids for the weekend, and our stack of mini-adventures included visiting the Poconos Snake & Animal Farm, Dingmans Ferry waterfalls, shopping in a cute little town called Milford, dining there at Bar Louis for their sushi pizza that I often dream about, and feeding pretzels to the scrawny deer in Mikey's front yard. Less exciting, but somehow more adventurous, than the real monkeys at the Poconos Snake & Animal Farm, was our search for the Ghost Monkeys of the Poconos at a place simply called The Candle Shoppe.

Lauren is the one who told me about the ghost monkeys, and knowing her as long as I have, it sounded to me like a typical Lauren-ism, where maybe she had blended two (or three, or more) stories together in her head and had unwittingly invented the whole thing. But, no, the Ghost Monkeys are real! Or, at least, there is really a story about Ghost Monkeys. We found the Candle Shoppe, about 20 miles from Mikey's cabin. Animal Planet had filmed an episode of "A Haunting" there last year about the Ghost Monkeys, and the shop(pe) has cleverly taken full advantage of it. Among the hundreds and hundreds of different double-scented candles you can find a particular one termed "Monkey Breath," as well as loads of t-shirts and stuffed monkeys. It's brilliant, really. A candle shop(pe) that kids beg their parents to take them to! They are even starting tours of the haunted basement after Memorial Day. Between Lauren and myself, we spent about $100 on gifts, and I will be taking Mikey there after the tours start, for sure!

So that was fun. But, alas, I didn't find the easy answers I was hoping for. I have found myself using the word, "alas," far too often lately.

I have a couple meetings lined up this week about working on some features this summer, and until these pan out, or don't, I can't figure out where I will be living or what I will be doing. IN the immortal words of Soul II Soul, it is, "back to life, back to reality," whatever that means. I did see some amazing places in PA that I would love to film in, I will tell you about them in my next post. I need to go do one of the many packing-related things I am procrastinating about right this very minute, though. It is good to be home. I just kind of wish I knew where home is going to be a month from now.