Happy Birthday to Me

May has been a banner month, and it is not over yet! Last week I got to see my director friend Adam Bronstein ("My Movie Girl") when his film was screening just outside of Philly. I hadn't seen Adam in a year and a half, when he last visited me in Baltimore. It was great to see him, I think we talked for 5 hours straight the first night and another 6 hours straight the next day. We're pretty well caught up now! Then this week, I FINALLY got back up to Mikey's cabin in the Poconos and got to see him for a couple days, and just chill. He went back to NYC today, so now I have a few days by myself to catch up on some reading and writing. I haven't been here since October, I really missed it, and Mikey. Also this week, my friend Bentley moved back to Baltimore, which makes me very happy. If all goes well, he will be my new roommate by the end of the summer, too.

All that is well and good and makes me happy to reconnect with my good friends, but the most important thing to happen this month is that I landed a job that I really, really wanted. Lately it was getting harder and harder to keep my chin up. A couple months ago I totally botched a job interview, by making the fatal error of not looking at the company's website before going to the meeting. A very dumb mistake, but it simply slipped my mind to do so - I hadn't been on a proper job interview in more than 13 years, and back then, not everybody even HAD a website. Then last month, a freelance gig that would have carried me through the entire summer fell through - after I had nearly maxed out my credit cards on a trip and surgery for my dog. I was starting to lose hope that I could continue to survive doing what I love doing, and would be forced to go back to what I once loved but now hate - hotel or restaurant management. There are good jobs out there in the hospitality industry that I would be more than qualified for, but just the thought of going back into that made me very depressed.

I was beginning to wonder if everything I have been doing for the last four years had been a waste of time. In a span of less than three years (the first year working on rewriting the screenplay for "Smalltimore") I worked on a total of eighteen productions, only three of which were my own projects, and won five awards. One-third of those films I worked on gratis, choosing those projects very carefully, to build my resume, my contacts, and a stockpile of favors. On other people's projects, I was most often a producer and/or assistant director, but I also racked up writing credits on five productions other than my own, and even a few acting credits.

But the last few months, things just seemed to stop clicking. People I thought I could count on turned out not to be what I thought they were. I was finding that a lot that I had paid forward was just that: not to be returned by the people I paid it to. My faith in humanity, and my own judgement of character, was a bit shaken. Still, I tried to hold on to the one credo I have in my life - that it, my life, always turns out the way it is supposed to. Sometimes it takes awhile to get there, sometimes it is a very scenic and unexpected route, but it always does get there. And once again, it has.

I won't mention the company name yet. I start work on Tuesday, and I want to make sure it is cool with them for me to talk about on my blog. But I can tell you that I will have the interesting title of Script Engineer. What the hell is that, you ask? Well, writing will be only about one-third of my job, and the rest will be rather technical computer programming that is going to take many months of training to get me up to speed. I will be scripting interactive training videos, which may sound boring but I don't think it will be boring at all. Some of these videos will be used to train people for jobs such as drug and alcohol counselors, people who deal with victims of sexual assault or abuse, and criminal investigators, among others. I will be a part of a team that researches these vocations in great detail, and then design programs to help them do their jobs more effectively. Getting to do what I love most, in a way that actually helps people? Pretty damn cool.

Of course, we'll see how it goes, but from what I know about it so far, this is a job that was practically custom tailored to my strengths, combining logic, empathy, and creativity. And to have a "regular" job in which I get paid to write has been probably the only consistent goal I have ever had in my life. I can't begin to tell you what that means to me. It was only one year ago that I received my first check ever for a writing gig. I probably only charged half of what I should have - but I likely would have been just as thrilled to do it for half of what I did get paid. For me, it was validation of the highest order. Like the first time I sold a photograph, I finally felt I could refer to myself as a photographer, or the first time "Smalltimore" was accepted to a festival, I could introduce myself as being a filmmaker. I know that I have always been a writer, but to be able to say that I do it for a living carries a weight that I have always longed for. I have never been so excited to start a job. No more sleeping in! No more Law & Order marathons! And I am actually happy about that!

So, I still haven't talked about the image at the top of this posting. This is the tarot card, "Strength," the eighth card in the deck. Something you may not know about me, I have, off and on for many years, read tarot cards, and I am told that I am pretty good at doing so. Strength is my favorite card, and is the card I use to represent myself in a reading. The image really speaks to me. Here is a woman, alone, dressed in a pure white robe, but her waist is entwined with red roses, significant of desire. The devil really is in the details. She is standing with a her hands on a lion. She may be opening its mouth or closing it, but either way, she has tamed this beast that in reality she should fear. The cold blue mountains in the distance represent logic, but there is also much green vegetation in the picture. A lemniscate of Eternal Life, also known as a figure 8, floats above her head. This card is about courage and fearlessness, but it is also about balance, and the importance of finding harmony between opposing forces. I don't know a lot about numerology, but there is something special about that symbol, "8". Everything is cyclical, everything comes back around. You get back whatever it is that you put out there in the universe. You might not get it back from the people or place that you think you will, but you will get it back. That is important to remember.

I start my new job on Tuesday, May 31st, which also happens to be my 44th birthday.

4 + 4 = 8


.

Each Day is Valentine's Day

[A quilt by Elizabeth Caldwell Talford Scott.]

Today was an amazing day. I knew that it would be, but at the same time I was not looking forward to it. Today I went to the funeral of Elizabeth Caldwell Talford Scott, the mother of Joyce J. Scott. You always hear people saying that they don't want their funeral to be sad, they want it to be a celebration. But for all those good intentions, I have never been to a funeral that truly was a celebration. Until today.

The chapel at the Joseph Brown Funeral Home practically vibrated with all the creative energy and talent that was assembled in that room, too many names to even drop, the Who's Who of the Baltimore art scene and beyond, faces I recognized from MICA, the BMA, The Reginald F. Lewis Museum, and The Creative Alliance. Many of these friends of Joyce had known her mother for many years, some had known her their whole life. They spoke lovingly of memories of Elizabeth, all of which of course also included Joyce. Lorraine Whittlesey, Joyce's collaborative partner in Ebony & Irony, played the organ before and during the service. Aissatou Bey-Gracia and Kay Lawal Muhammed (Joyce's other half in The Thunder Thigh Revue) gave a spoken word performance of "Ode to Mama Lizzie," a poem by Joyce for her mother. George Ciscle, Dr. Leslie King-Hammond, Oletha Devane, Ellen Burchenal, and Linda DePalma gave their remembrances of Elizabeth, as did Kweisi Mfume, just three days after he spoke at William Donald Schaeffer's funeral.

I learned a lot about Mama Lizzie today that made me wish even more so that I could have really known her. By the time I met her in 2008 she was in need of 24-hour care, and could only communicate with Joyce and a few who knew her best and took care of her. This was at the time that I had asked Joyce to take a role in "Smalltimore". Though Joyce wanted to do it, it meant less time with her mother, and having to make arrangements for her care during the many hours Joyce would be on the set. To my eternal gratitude, Joyce worked it out and was able to take the role. Not many people know this, but originally the character's name was Mrs. Wainwright. The character is a wealthy, eccentric, widowed artist, and I thought "Wainwright" sounded like a rich name, and it was also the last name of a close friend. But I wanted to do something to show Joyce how honored I was that she took the role, and something to honor her mother, for the sacrifice, so I told Joyce that I would like to change the character's name to Mrs. Talford. So that is how that came to be.

I learned today that Elizabeth Caldwell Talford Scott has had her artwork exhibited in the Museum of Modern Art; has taught workshops at The Smithsonian Museum; and had received the Women's Caucus for Honor Award for Outstanding Achievements in the Visual Arts. I learned more than I had already known about the sacrifices she had made for Joyce, learned more about the passions she instilled in Joyce, and learned about the ones that didn't take, such as cooking and gardening.

I flashed back to a recent event, Joyce speaking at the Reginald F. Lewis Museum shortly after the opening of the group show, "Material Girls," a current exhibit at the museum in which Joyce has several pieces. Before she started to talk that day, she first broke into song, which Joyce is prone to do at any given moment. "There'll be one child born..." she sang, "to carry on..." She sang the whole song. Her audience was so rapt that other than her voice you could have heard a pin drop. I wrote about that day a few posts earlier in this blog, and I mentioned that I became emotional several times during her talk, but especially during this song. Before that, I didn't know exactly what she was going to be talking about that day. When she sang it, I knew that she was about to talk about her mother. And, knowing her mother's age and health, I flashed forward to the day that was closer than we could have known at the time - the day that Joyce would have to say goodbye to her mother.

Joyce appeared to be very strong and calm today. It truly felt as if this vibration of love, respect, admiration, and joy, was helping Joyce to lift her mother's spirit to the sky. My own strength came and went, as I felt her pain, and thought of my own loss eight years ago when I was with my Dad for the last five weeks of his very short life. The service was flowing gently through the scheduled songs and speakers. About halfway through the program, I believe it was after Leslie and Oletha spoke, Joyce, unscripted, began to sing. She stayed in her seat in the front row, looking straight ahead, and sang, "My Funny Valentine," from beginning to end. No one moved a muscle. I heard someone whisper that it had been one of Elizabeth's favorite songs. One by one, people, myself included, wiped a tear, then two, then three, trying to be discreet, wishing we had Joyce's strength, wishing we could be as strong as her, for her.

"Don't change a hair for me. Not if you care for me. Stay, Funny Valentine, stay...
Each day is Valentine's Day..."

Finally, on the last two words, Joyce's voice broke.
As did my heart.

And others who refuse to admit,
That life without magnanimous love ain't worth spit.
That Mama Lizzy and her contemporaries will bust the universe and wax
Contrary,
She's the silver horizon between dusk and dawn.

~ from "Ode to Mama Lizzie"
by Joyce J. Scott

Resolve, Rekindled

[Me with Cici Carmen (lead actress) and Michelle Farrell (DP) at the premiere of Gone Forever (writer /director Jason Baustin) at the AFI Theater in Silver Spring.]

The last couple of months have felt a little... off. Some financial realities are setting in. I knew the winter months would be slow, but I was hoping by now, mid-April, I would have a few more summer projects set in stone. Michelle assures me that this is still the slow time, but she is also worried that the dawn of the DSLR camera may be costing freelancers like ourselves a lot of business. That may be part of it, but it takes a lot more than buying a camera to make a movie. I think that a larger part of the problem is that the economy still sucks. Making an independent film is, in some ways, a luxury. And in a bad economy, luxuries are the first thing to go.

Recently a project fell through that would have kept me both busy and paid for a few months. Not worth going into the details of it, and as a professional, I wouldn't anyway. Long story short, some things are more important than money. Things such as integrity, sanity, happiness, blood pressure, and my reputation as a producer. I take all of the above very seriously. Money to me is a well that always finds a way to refill itself. I always find a way to land on my feet.

A few weeks of stress was luckily followed by a few days of being reminded why I do what I do and that there are people out there who are glad that I do it. Friday afternoon I showed the rough cut of a new music video to a client, Tony Bonz, and he absolutely loved it. It was a very fun project to work on, and Tony put all of his trust in me, and Michelle, to manifest his vision into a tangible product. Though that trust helps to make a project go smoothly, in a way it adds more pressure to get it right. But also more satisfaction when you do!

Then yesterday I attended the premiere of "Gone Forever", a dramatic short by writer/director Jason Baustin that I was producer and AD on last fall. Jason really went all out. The premiere was at the AFI Theater in Silver Spring, a fantastic venue, and included a catered lunch for all attendees, as well as professionally packaged DVDs for cast & crew. It was so good to see all the friendly faces of the people with whom I spent 5 days in the trenches seven months ago. It was a very ambitious, challenging piece to make (more than a dozen locations in a 25 minute script, car crash, SFX, shot on The Red) but it all went pretty smoothly, with an ace group of cast and crew. Seeing two projects that I am very proud to be associated with come to fruition really eased the disappointment of the cancelled project, and shored up my resolve to follow my instincts.

At the premiere, a friend I hadn't seen since the "Gone Forever" shoot (we used a room in his house as one of our locations) told me that he just watched "Smalltimore" again a couple nights ago. To hear that, of course, would make me happy at any time, but the timing made it mean a little more to me. Also in the last few days, an actor who was in "Smalltimore" called me to order three DVDs he wanted to give to some people from WBAL who are interviewing him about something else, and Minas Gallery contacted me to bring them another batch of DVDs as they have sold all the ones they had in stock. Combined, these little bits of encouragement totaled the shot in the arm I was in need of at this moment.

A good friend of mine, whose job was making him absolutely miserable, called me earlier in the week to sound off. He was considering quitting his job without having a job, which is usually not advisable, but the work situation was truly effecting both his physical and mental well-being. Being a bit stressed about the flow of income myself these days, I hesitated, at first, to encourage him to quit. But I know him well enough to know that he had already made up his mind, and was looking more for support than advice. Life is too short, I said. I can't stress that enough, to anyone, ever. He turned in his resignation the next day and has been celebrating ever since.

Some things are more important than money.

Most things, actually.

The Winds of Change

This photo is of a wind farm at the top of a mountain on Route 30 in Pennsylvania. I have traveled this road countless times, though it is only in the last few years that the wind farm appeared. Growing up in Pennsylvania, we would take Route 30 through the Laurel Highlands to come down to D.C. to visit my Grandmother. Now, starting in the opposite direction, I take this road from Baltimore to visit my Mother in Pennsylvania. Along this same road, also known as the Lincoln Highway, is a bison farm. That wasn't there when I was little either, at least not that I can remember, and I think I would remember seeing a field of big woolly bison. There is also the remnants of a magical place called Storybook Forest, now closed, that we used to go to when I was very young. You could walk through Snow White's house, and the shoe from the nursery rhyme, "There was an old woman who lived in a shoe..." At Bald Knob Summit, the highest point and most winding stretch of road on the trip, is a scenic lookout where you can see seven counties, on a clear day. Just past that used to be an amazing hotel that was built to look like a giant ship, it looked like the real thing, perched right on top of the mountain. We never went inside of it, but it was one of the markers that my brother and I always got excited about seeing on the way to Grandma's. It burned to the ground a long time ago. Not far from there, in tiny Shanksville, is a sign directing travelers to the Flight 93 Memorial, where that jet crashed on 9/11. I have stopped there a couple times, though I haven't been there since the memorial actually went up, so I don't know what it looks like. When I went there, it was just a big, grassy field, and you could kind of see where the earth had been carved by the wreckage. It reminded me of the field I saw in Lockerbie, Scotland. Two friends of mine were killed on Pan Am 103, that exploded over Lockerbie in 1988. I went to see Lockerbie for myself about 15 years later. There, too, the earth, though scarred, had healed itself.

At the top of Laurel Mountain on Route 30, about 45 minutes away from where I grew up, is the dilapidated remains of a restaurant that my Father owned when I was in high school. By then my parents were divorced, and my brother and I spent many weekends up there. I really loved that place, and would dream of when I was all grown up and would inherit the business from my Dad. The jukebox had had John Cougar Mellancamp and Toni Basil. Dad would let us play the video poker machine if no one was in the bar. It is a pretty isolated spot, and a lot of the clientele were bikers, including some Pagans. They were always nice to us, though, and I remember teaching one of them how to play the arcade game Ladybug. And the cook grew pot back in the woods behind the building.

It is funny to me now, thinking so far back, that at that time I thought that that place, and that business, was my future. I did go on to work in and manage restaurants for awhile, and so did my brother. It had never occurred to me, regardless of my love for writing and drawing, that growing up to be an artist of any sort was a viable option. It took me most of my life, and it took Baltimore, to show me that it was not only an option, but a moral imperative.

Today I spent the afternoon at the Reginald F. Lewis Museum of African-American Art, filming Joyce J. Scott, who is the subject of a documentary I am working on, giving a talk. (by the way, do yourself a favor and go to see the exhibit there called "Material Girls" that just opened; Joyce has 6 pieces in this exhibit, plus several pieces in the museum's permanent collection) Steve Yeager was kind enough to come with me and operate the camera. Joyce spoke for almost an hour, showing slides of her work, and of her family, and talking about how she evolved as an artist. She joked that she was an artist "in vitro", and claimed to have put her signature on her placenta when she popped out, so her parents could sell it and make some money. Everyone laughed, of course, and so did I, but I also knew she was perfectly serious. Joyce has been an artist all of her life, it is all she has ever been or wanted to be. She is probably the most gifted person I have ever met. And as she put it, when someone asked her about being an artist at the talk today, she is, "the right person for the job."

As I listened, and laughed, from time to time I found myself getting very emotional. I try to make sure that at all times, I appreciate what I have, where I am in life, and the company that I keep. And here I was, at 2:36 pm on February 19th, in a wonderful museum in my favorite city in the world, making a movie about this amazing woman who has agreed to let me spend the next year finding out everything I can about her. Have I mentioned that Joyce has two pieces of her work in the Smithsonian? Have I mentioned that my camera man, Steve Yeager, is a Sundance Award-winning director? And have I mentioned, most importantly, that they are both my friends? Sometimes I just can't believe how lucky and blessed I am, and today was one of those days.

It was one of those, "If you told me five years ago, that I would be..." moments. I have those once in awhile. But it was more than that. It hasn't even been three years since I made my first film. I didn't realize, when I was making "Smalltimore", that it would change my life forever. But it did. I learned a lot about Joyce today that I didn't know, and I realized that one year from now, I will once again have transformed. There is no way that this project is NOT going to change me, significantly. I don't know how it is going to change me, exactly, but I believe it will be for the better. Change is almost always for the better. I am glad that I am not afraid of change anymore.

My Dad's restaurant has been empty for many years now. The roof is caving in, windows are broken, and a collection of abandoned vehicles are rusting in the overgrown parking lot. It makes me a little sad when I see it. I wish it were a place where I could stop in and have a beer, introduce myself to the proprieter and reminisce a little. But, maybe it is better this way.

Scattered Pictures...

(Me during rehearsals for Smalltimore, way back in July of 2008, also known as, yesterday. Photo by Richard Payne)

I recently found a file containing photos from "Smalltimore" rehearsals that I have not previously published. As I sit in my home office, surrounded by hard drives and head shots, I am kind of floored about where I am right now, compared to the moments captured in these photos, only two and a half years ago.

It may be hard to tell from the above photo, but actually I was really happy. This was not a posed shot, I was honestly engrossed in what the actors were doing. I'll share some photos of that at the end of this post. Maybe I wasn't so much happy as... focused. I want to be able to look back at that time, of those two grueling weeks of production that came after 4 months of non-stop pre-production, and tell you how much fun I had. And I did, sometimes, but most of the time I looked exactly like this photo, i.e., stressed. That is just how I look when I am thinking. The good thing about it is, it keeps people from interrupting me while I am thinking because they are a little bit frightened of me when I am in that state. The bad thing is that I continue to look like this when, say, someone snaps a photo of me.

I could be wrong, but I think I actually look younger now than I do in this photograph. I AM thinking, and focused, right this minute, but I am also smiling from ear to ear. Yesterday I sealed a deal with a client who contracted me to adapt a script for her; we are in pre-production now. I'll be producing and directing her film this summer. Today I received a letter from the Creative Alliance, to confirm that I will be teaching two film-related classes there in April. Today I also introduced some of the soundtrack artists from "Smalltimore" to Chris LaMartina, writer/director of "Witch's Brew" that I worked on last summer. Hopefully he can use some of their music for that soundtrack. Tonight I had a casting call with another client, for a music video we are shooting next month. I'm also producing and directing that, and likely shooting both with my partner in crime, Director of Photography Extraordinaire, Michelle Farrell. Tomorrow I have a lunch meeting with a gentleman who is starting up a new film festival here in Baltimore, the Baltimore Film Festival International. I'll be speaking at their event this coming Monday evening (2/7), at Breathe Books in Hampden. After that appointment tomorrow, I will be meeting with Jineara Dawn, a young filmmaker and actor with whom I have worked on several projects. We have at least three projects to talk about, that I want to get her on board. Friday night I'll be attending my friend Mauricio Osorio's premiere of his documentary, "On One Field," at the Creative Alliance. It received an amazing write-up in today's City Paper, check it out! Later this month I will be working on the next-to-last shoot for Steve Yeager's film, "The Rosens". This is the opening of the film, a scene which I wrote.

Sounds exciting, doesn't it? It is, despite the fact that I lost my job-job (and health insurance, and living quarters, and cushy paycheck) eleven months ago. If the subject comes up in conversation, sometimes when I tell people that, they give me the sad face and say they are so sorry. I'm not. Not for a minute. It doesn't come up much anymore, and I am trying not to let it come up at all. It was another life, a lifetime ago. I no longer have one foot in the boat and one on the nice, safe pier. I am sailing the seven seas! No longer am I a former hotel manager. I am a filmmaker. That is all.



[Cheryl Scungio, one of the most dedicated actors I have ever worked with.]



[My boys! Johnny Benson, Darik Bernard, and Phil Calvert. I love this photo.]



[Kelly Coston, Johnny, and Cheryl, rehearsing one of my favorite scenes in the movie. It wasn't really an important scene, but the chemistry between the three is amazing and hilarious.]



[Kyle Holtgren and Kelly. Good lord, we laughed so much during rehearsal for this scene! Why didn't anyone take a picture of me then?!]



[Orlando Gonzales, Joyce J. Scott, and Cheryl. I have published this photo before, but it is one of my favorites. There is no scene where Gracie (Cheryl) hugs Mrs. Talford (Joyce). I can't remember exactly what happened, but either Orlando or Cheryl screwed up their line in a way that if taken out of context could be seen as offensive. And Joyce can just NEVER let something like that slide. She had us all cracking up.]



[Orlando catching his breath between rehearsing make-out sessions with Cheryl. He turned Snooki down for a make-out session in a club in Miami last year! I am not making this up.]



[and finally... if that a...? It is! A SMILE!!! It was an amazing experience, that played a big part in where I find myself today. I thank everyone in these photos, plus the rest of the cast and crew, for being a part of it. Yay, memories...]

A Good Problem to Have

[Jennifer Swartout portrays Janis Joplin in the movie short, "Janis." Go to the Facebook page "Steel Corset Productions" for details and find out where and when YOU can see it!]

Hey there... another long spell of not blogging... I know, I suck, but it is just that I have been so crazy busy I have had no time or energy to write. But I really DO want to keep you in the loop! So please join me on my new Facebook page, STEEL CORSET PRODUCTIONS ( http://www.facebook.com/pages/Baltimore-MD/Steel-Corset-Productions/169509529729209?ref=ts ).

There, in the soundbite style we have all become accustomed/addicted to, you can find out exactly what I am/have been/will be up to, and find out in a way timely enough so that you may actually attend some of these events instead of just hearing about the aftermath! Also I will be posting there whenever people like extras, interns, or production assistants are needed, so if you have always wanted to work on a movie set you will likely soon have the opportunity. I will also list calls for crew and actor auditions there, for my own projects as well as my filmmaker friends.

I'm going to try to be a better twitterer, too, but no promises there.

But become a fan ("like") Steel Corset Productions ASAP, because things are happening! Tomorrow night is the premiere screening of, "Lamplight," at the Wind-up Space, where you will also be able to see the very first teaser/trailer for Chris Lamartina's "Witch's Brew." And if you see a young woman that looks like a pretty version of Janis Joplin, that is my friend Jen Swartout who indeed portrays Janis Joplin in a short we collaborated on this summer that will be screening soon at the Creative Alliance. So, in a nutshell that is tomorrow night, you can see the fruits of my summer of labor. But you need to go to the Facebook page to get all the details, because it is a lot of info and, as usual, I am exhausted!

P.S. this does NOT mean I am completely abandoning the blog! I will post a link to it on the SCP Facebook page whenever I make a new post. I am heading to the Poconos for several days, so I very well may have some time to write!

DUDE...

"DUDE...," as I have come to know this phrase, is short for, "DUDE, you don't even KNOW..." Which is pretty much how I would describe my life to just about anyone these days.

I had a late lunch with the Director I am currently working with, Chris Lamartina. I got called, "Dude," quite a bit during that conversation. With most people of the opposite sex, I have a problem if they call me, "dude". But for Chris, I understand. I've been working with him for for about a month now on the set, and there are different inflections of dude-ism with him. Sometimes it means, "Really, dude, what the hell?!" Sometimes it means, "Dude, just work with me." And sometimes it means, "Dude, I'm pretty sure you know what I am talking about." For the most part, with me, I think so anyway, I get the latter.

Currently I am working as Assistant Director on Chris' latest flick, "Witch's Brew". I am having an absolute blast. I want to tell you all about it, and all about the half dozen other projects I am involved in at the moment, but honestly, I am just so frickin' EXHAUSTED. So that, being exhausted as a direct result of being busy, is why I am, at the moment, a horrible blogger. A good problem to have, methinks.

The bottom line, which I hope to have time to tell you more about, soon, is that I feel like things are working out the way I had hoped, and that my personal and professional investments are paying off. I can honestly refer to myself as a freelance filmmaker now.

There are some realities about that that are not so convenient, like not having health insurance. Sunday night on the set, I grabbed a piece of caramel candy from the craft services table. That 5 cent pice of candy cost me $120, after it pulled out a dental crown. But, whatever, things happen.

The larger picture is that I am... poor...ish... but ridiculously happy. I am not even exaggerating. DUDE. I mean, you can do things that pay the bills; you can do things that suit you; and you can do what you were meant to do. It does not bother me that I am finding out now that I should be doing this. I am not sure I would have been able to do it earlier in my life.

But seriously, Dude. I went out for dinner with friends tonight, and a few martinis later I am a bit loopy. Glad I could make a short post (I have been feeling guilty about it), but would love to chat more when I have the time as well as the cognitive fortitude. I don't expect you to stay sharply tuned, when I slag off and only post every once in a blue moon. But I will let you know if I ever intend to abandon it completely, so until then, check in with me once in awhile!

Toodles,
JC